Described by those who knew him as “a fierce advocate for children,” John Graham encouraged young people to improve themselves on the tennis court as executive director of Hampton Racquet in East Hampton and before that at the Ross School, Sportime in Amagansett, and East Hampton Indoor Tennis.
But he was also an advocate for them off the court, as a former board member of the Eleanor Whitmore Early Childhood Center here and a supporter of Project Most, a nonprofit that offers after-school and enrichment activities for elementary students.
In turn, he was “loved by children of all ages,” his friends and family wrote.
Mr. Graham, who ran Hampton Racquet from 2012 until this year, died of esophageal cancer on Aug. 16 at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York City. He was 63 and had been ill for two years.
Just as tennis and children were a constant in his life, so too was music. Mr. Graham was a fan of Bob Dylan, David Bowie, and Lou Reed, and was known for his music compilations, which he shared with friends over the decades, first as mixed tapes, then on CDs, and more recently as Spotify playlists. And he loved the Mets, his family said.
He supported and hosted events for the Don Sharkey Memorial Community Fund, the Wounded Warrior Project, Fighting Chance, which provides support and advocacy for people with cancer, the Retreat, a domestic violence agency, and the Ellen Hermanson Foundation, a nonprofit that helps women with breast health care and also those affected by breast cancer. He was honored by the foundation at its Back in Black gala in 2021.
Mr. Graham spread kindness and “had a great sense of humor,” his friends and family said, describing him as “unselfish,” “vibrant,” and “ever honest without pretense.” He “had transformed and changed himself for the better, despite struggles and pain.”
“His last chapter was probably the best,” they said.
John Thomas Graham was born in Flushing, Queens, on Nov. 7, 1960, to Harry S. Graham and the former Eileen Molyneux. He grew up in Flushing, playing tennis from the age of 6 at the Port Washington Tennis Academy. After graduating from the Loyola School in Manhattan, he earned his undergraduate degree from St. John’s University. He lived in Newport and San Jose, Calif., briefly in the 1980s and spent a year in Tempe, Ariz., in the late 1990s.
Mr. Graham split his time between Buell Lane Extension in East Hampton and Miami, where he spent winters.
He is survived by his girlfriend, Alison Ann Houtte of Homestead, Fla., and by his siblings Monica Graham of East Hampton, Kevin Graham of Port Washington, Mark Graham of Northport, and Mary Graham of New York City. He leaves two nieces, a great-niece, and two great-nephews.
Two brothers, Robert Graham and Christopher Graham, died before him.
A date for a service has not yet been set, but donations in his memory can be directed to Memorial Sloan Kettering, Gastroesophageal Cancer Therapeutics Accelerator, P.O. Box 27106, New York City 10087-7106, or online at bit.ly/3yYHm6e.
