Consider January

January is a wonderful month. Lawns and gardens need not be tended and outdoor work can be deferred until spring. Seed catalogue orders were mailed off in December; there's nothing left to do now but wait.

Bird-watchers, snug indoors, can feel virtuous while studying their field guides. The Christmas counts have come and gone.

No one need feel guilty about not jogging or biking. The days are short and cold; the nights long and cold. Perfect conditions to stay home and read, listen to music, catch up on sleep, or watch television.

Bean soups, rich stews, and hot toddies are the order of the day. Speaking of orders, restaurant lines are short, even on weekends. Same thing at the movies.

**

January is a terrible month.

Cheeks sting. Eyes tear. Gray skies offer not a wisp of hope. The ocean looks like punishment.

Fish are in hiding. So are their pursuers.

Everyone else has engineered a way to get out of town; we eat the dust in their wake. Bills have never been higher. Taxes loom.

New Year's resolve has liquified as the earth has hardened. Fat advances over the waistband. Car heaters take too long to kick in. Video store shelves are empty. Stores shorten their hours, if they are open at all.

Cats stand inside the door and ask to be let out. Disbelieving, they ask to be let in. The cycle goes on endlessly.

**

January. We would be sad if it never came at all, and will be very glad when it has gone.