Stephen L. Friedes, M.D., of East Hampton died of pancreatic cancer at the Kanas Center for Hospice Care in Quiogue on April 7. He was 67 and had been living and working with pancreatic cancer for more than four years.
Dr. Friedes had practiced psychiatry in East Hampton since 1993, after he moved here with his family from Manhattan. According to his family, “he found joy in sports, Coca-Cola, and a good steak.” He loved East Hampton since the 1960s, when he started coming out with his parents, who bought a small house here. “He knew right away that this was where he wanted to live. When he was finished with his schooling, he came out here to work and live as soon as he could,” they wrote.
Stephen Larry Friedes was born in Brooklyn on Aug. 21, 1952, one of two children of Carl Samuel Friedes and Bess Yaloff Friedes. He grew up there, graduating from Brooklyn Technical High School and then earning a bachelor’s degree in psychology at Syracuse University. He went on to earn a master’s in business administration at New York University, followed by an M.D. at SUNY Downstate College of Medicine. His family said he received many awards and honors throughout his academic career, and, more recently, he was given an award for courage from the National Pancreas Foundation.
Dr. Friedes completed his four-year residency in psychiatry at North Shore University Hospital in Manhasset and was chief resident of psychiatry in the fourth year. He established his practice on Newtown Lane in East Hampton Village and consulted for the Catholic Charities Drug and Alcohol Clinic in Bridgehampton. He was chairman of psychiatry at Southampton Hospital from 2001 to 2015.
After working, his family said, he enjoyed relaxing at Cittanuova, Fresno, or Bobby Van’s restaurants. Every Sunday morning he would buy a bagel and cup of coffee at Goldberg’s Famous Bagels and go sit at the ocean.
He married Adrienne Rainer in June 1977. Mrs. Friedes survives, as do their three children, Marissa Cangiolosi of East Hampton, Adam Friedes of Central Islip, and Rebecca Friedes of Brooklyn. In addition, two grandchildren, Sailor and Decker Cangiolosi, survive. His sister, Marla Friedes of New Paltz, N.Y., died before him. Eight first cousins, three nieces, one nephew, an uncle, Albert Friedes of East Brunswick, N.J., and an aunt, Ruth Landy of West Bay Shore, survive as well.
Dr. Friedes was devoted to his family and his patients. People “who knew him best cited his humor and wit, intelligence, refreshing bluntness, and grit,” his family wrote. He had maintained his childhood friendships from Brooklyn “till the end,” they said.
The family has suggested memorial donations to the Lustgarten Foundation for Pancreatic Cancer Research, 415 Crossways Park Drive, Suite D, Woodbury 11797, also at lustgarten.org or 516-737-1550.
Because a memorial gathering is not possible at present, the family has asked friends and patients of Dr. Friedes to email memories or thoughts to [email protected], or mail them to 62 Newtown Lane, Suite 201, East Hampton 11937.
A celebration of Dr. Friedes's life will be held at a later date.